Marriage Help

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Love Hurts

There’s a well-known Roy Orbison song called “Love Hurts” that kicks off with these words: “Love hurts/love’s scars, love wounds and mars.”

While singer Roy Orbison was no marriage guru, his lyrics hit home. You feel pain when someone you love betrays or injures you. Certain actions or attitudes – unfaithfulness, selfishness, addiction — can wreak emotional and even physical wounds on a relationship that’s supposed to make you feel happy and safe. And when those wounds come from the person with whom you’ve joined yourself, heart and soul, in a covenant before God, the knife twists–and the pain increases.

The truth is, sometimes love hurts because we’re fallen creatures living in a fallen world. This broken world often hands us unwelcome trials –  a job loss, a miscarriage, a chronic illness, a child with special needs. But sometimes our own needy nature causes us to inflict pain on our spouse by succumbing to volcanic anger, abuse, or an addiction (pornography, alcohol, even television). Whether it’s done unwittingly or intentionally, we damage our marriage when we go MIA emotionally, fight, or react to conflict in passive-aggressive or narcissistic ways instead of ways that honor God and resolve problems.

When your spouse hurts you, your marriage is hurt. And when your marriage is hurt, you hurt. It’s as simple and as circular as that, like the wedding band you wear. But God can provide hope, help, and healing. Check out the following articles to help you when love hurts — and your marriage feels the pain.

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My Battle with Pornography

Aaron, can we talk?” I found my husband lying in bed, ready to go to sleep. Three and a half

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Those Things We Do — How Men Contribute to Relationship Problems

She’s upset…again. And I don’t have a clue about why. Six years of dating followed by 26 years of marriage

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God’s Answer for Those Who Mourn, Grieve, and Despair

One of the most beautiful passages in the Hebrew Scriptures, Isaiah 61:2-3, says that the Lord will comfort those who

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Don’t Let Tragedy Tear You Apart

“No, babe, you never told me we had a meeting today.” My husband’s tone was firm and more than annoyed.

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Marriage in the Real World

Jim got sick and had to forsake his climb up the corporate ladder, bringing a stress he never anticipated into

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Hope for the Victim of Domestic Violence

• Also See Abuse | Counseling At least one in four women experiences violence from her partner at some point

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Your Husband the Volcano

Living with an angry husband is like living at the base of an active volcano. It can keep you in

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When Times Get Tough

When we discovered I was pregnant with our fourth child, I immediately fell in love with this tiny stranger whose

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Lost That Lovin’ Feeling?

All marriages go through periods where things just aren’t as they should be. The stress and pace of life cause

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Safety Before Intimacy

 The gentleman sitting before me was utterly demoralized, his face ashen with his long, graying hair falling into his face.

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