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Overcoming Porn Addiction
 When
a man is ensnared by sexual sin — soft-core or hard-core pornography,
Internet liaisons, or adultery — his wife's love and trust
are shattered. However, if he chooses purity— and if his wife
chooses mercy — trust can blossom again amidst the ruins. Healing
can begin when both people face the truth and confront the problem
head on. The husband must understand that he needs to return to
living by God's boundaries rather than his own.
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- First, you must acknowledge the addiction exists. Many
who are caught in the trap of addiction will adamantly
deny the problem. He who conceals his transgressions will
not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will
find compassion. — Proverbs 28:13
- You must recognize that what you are doing is wrong.
Addicts find a way to justify their problem in their mind.
For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and
the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is
not from the Father, but is from the world.— I John
2:16
- You must not blame others - "If my wife/husband
were just more affectionate." ... "If women/men
were not so seductive." Adam blamed Eve and she blamed
the serpent. Instead, you must begin to take responsibility
for your actions.
- Make yourself accountable to a spiritual authority,
perhaps a pastor or mature believer. Everybody needs a
"safe" person to share their struggles with.
Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for
one another, so that you may be healed. The effective
prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. — James
5:16
- You must recognize that "will power" is not
the answer. At a weak moment, your "will" may
fail you. By admitting that you are in need of God's help,
you open access to His supernatural intervention in your
life. You must yield your will to God's will. That's when
He can begin a new work in your life.
- Study the Word of God concerning sexual purity. Therefore
putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness,
in humility receive the Word implanted, which is able
to save your souls. — James 1:21
- You must destroy any pornography in your possession.
You can't wean yourself off pornography. Think of the
hidden pornography in your home as a ticking time bomb
that will ultimately destroy your family.
- You must learn to flee temptation. Self-deception may
enter when you think you can play with fire without getting
burned. Do not enter the path of the wicked, and do not
proceed in the way of evil men. Avoid it, do not pass
by it. Turn away from it and pass on.— Proverbs 4:14,15
- Give yourself time to work through the process of recovery.
More often than not, God chooses to take us through a
learning and growing process, that can be very painful.
Victory over addiction should be viewed as a marathon,
not a sprint.
- It's cliche, but you must approach your addiction one
day at a time. Look for little victories and rejoice in
the progress you're making. Recovery is a cinch by the
inch, but a trial by the mile.
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Steve Arterburn
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