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Trina's day began like most normal days for an active mom of three. Getting the kids off to school by 7:45, a quick shower, and a cup of coffee while mapping out her strategy for attacking her day. She had to return some items to a department store, pick up a few groceries, stop at the dry cleaners, run home for lunch, and make it to her 1:15 dental appointment. Then she would sprint home and prepare supper before the stampede of after-school carnivores arrived. The errands took longer than expected—they usually do—and she really didn't have time to go home for lunch before her dental appointment. So Trina decided to stop in and surprise Mike at the office by taking him his favorite Chinese takeout—Mongolian beef. As she pulled into the office parking lot, she saw Mike leaving the building and heading for his car with his secretary, Vicki. Trina felt her stomach tighten. Mike had told her that morning that he would be working through lunch because the Johnson project bids had to be in by 5:00. Trina watched as Mike and Vicki brushed against each other as they walked. They hardly took their eyes off each other! In fact, they seemed so engrossed with each other that they didn't seem to notice much else. When they got to the car, Mike opened the door for Vicki—like he used to for Trina. She tossed her curly auburn hair over one shoulder, slid onto the leather seats, and drew her slender legs into the car. Mike's approving smile transported Trina back to their dating days. "That's the smile he used to give me!" she thought. "That's my husband!" Trina stared in disbelief. "They're lovers!" she silently screamed. "That's how Mike and I were when we were dating." She wanted to scream, cry, and throw up all at once. She felt powerless to stop the soap opera that was playing itself out before her eyes. She followed them as they left the parking lot. Mike drove to Vicki's apartment, and the two disappeared inside. Trina thought her heart would explode. Just a few minutes earlier, her life had been so good, so normal. Now, she felt like the victim of a hit-and-run accident: dazed, bleeding, abandoned, and left to die—alone. She almost passed out from the concussion to her heart and soul. "This can't be happening to me!" she sobbed. Many spouses, like Trina, are blindsided by the blow of betrayal that comes from discovering their mate's affair. Even if we haven't experienced it firsthand, all of us know someone close who has suffered from the painful wounds inflicted by an unfaithful spouse. The purpose of this booklet is to provide understanding and hope for a spouse whose marriage has been shattered by an affair. We will describe varying levels of unfaithfulness, trace its roots, and walk through the healing process that is so necessary after unfaithfulness is discovered. Our desire is to help a betrayed partner think about how to respond to a situation that feels overwhelming and hopeless. We will explore how God Himself offers timeless answers and assurances that can help us deal with one of the most painful of human experiences. We will see that in spite of the pain, loss, and betrayal, there is hope. Life, even though it will be forever different after an affair, can be good again. In the midst of devastation and heartache, God's presence provides the compelling courage and sustaining strength needed to walk through the pain and madness of the dark valley that feels like death (Ps. 23:4). Author Tim Jackson is a licensed counselor in Michigan and is Senior Counselor in the RBC biblical correspondence department. 
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