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ibaRN96
Newbie
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 1
Location: Colorado
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 Posted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 10:43 am Post subject: spirit of God or the devil |
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| I have always been told that women have intuition. For 2 years I have had this feeling in the pit of my stomach regarding a female acquiantance. I have strong feelings that she is attracted to my husband. I have asked my husband frequently and it causes lots of arguments. He denies that anything has happened and even denies she has ever been inappropriate. I cannot get over this overwhelming feeling. How do I know if this is God warning me or if this is Satan trying to stir up strife in my marriage. To make matters worse my parents visited and both of them made comments about that I should never allow my husband and her to be alone. Unfortunately there are lots of time the two of them are alone and due to my work schedule they spend a lot of time on the weekends together doing things with all of our kids. I know there is a friendship there, but I do not want to over react and cause more strife in my marriage. Please advise. |
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SAM
Veteran
Joined: 03 Mar 2001
Posts: 2162
Location: Chicago
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| Posted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 1:36 pm Post subject: |
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I'm a firm believer that the Holy Spirit sends us "warning signals".
| Quote: | | Unfortunately there are lots of time the two of them are alone and due to my work schedule they spend a lot of time on the weekends together doing things with all of our kids. |
There are always boundaries that need to be established in marriage.
For me and my husband the primary one is: we do not spend any time alone with another man or woman. It's one that has protected our marriage for many years.
Even if the kids are present, there is still an opportunity for friendship and emotional attachment to occur.
And, you have had family members mention something to you. They obviously saw something that was alarming to them. God does speak to us through others.
Proverbs 6:27-28
Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned?
Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?
Proverbs 4:14-16
Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evil men.
Avoid it, do not travel on it; turn from it and go on your way.
For they cannot sleep till they do evil; they are robbed of slumber till they make someone fall.
1 Thessalonians 5:21-22
Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil.
Let's reverse the roles -
What if was your husband was the one who worked weekends and you were spending time with the kids and another man?
Once, many years ago, there was a woman acquaintance at my husband's work. Whenever Christmas parties or picnics would come up, she was immediately at my husband's side. She smiled a certain way and laughed at all his comments, she flipped her hair and touched his arm or hand quite frequently. He did mention once that during the course of their workday, she would stop by to chat. Alarm bells went off and I said something to my husband. He was oblivious to it until a co-worker mentioned something to him. Then he paid attention and did everything he could to avoid her at all costs.
Your husband may feel it is innocent and they are "just" friends. But you and others do not see it that way. Which means "avoid every kind of evil' - which means avoiding the appearance of sin. |
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Empty Shell of a Man
Junior Member
Joined: 11 Oct 2007
Posts: 29
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| Posted: Mon Dec 03, 2007 9:38 am Post subject: |
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I agree fully with the response....
I would want to explore why he gets so angry when you ask him. that is a red flag.
reversing the roles in dialog to him is really the best way to say "treat others the way you want to be treated" as Christ taught. Would he mind you working closely with a male "friend" and have a "friendship"?
My wife, after reading material recommended here, including about building a hedge around our marriage, now fully understands that I am to have no female friends and she is to have no male friends. Period. We are to forsake all others. We have friends that are couples. We also do not kiss------
meaning: I kiss her, my daughters, or elderly aunts. No one else. My kisses are for her. she can kiss her sons, her dad, etc.
We don't kiss or embrace friends of the opposite sex; even if it sounds old-fashioned...the author was right: how do you know the woman you are kissing doesn't NEED that kiss, that you mean only in friendship?
"forsaking all others..." |
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