Dying Over Here

Missing Him · Newbie Joined: 11 Apr 2006 Posts: 13

Dying over here.

My DH told me last night that he is never coming home. He said he will never change, never get help and never get better. He just likes the drugs too much. Also he can never forgive himself for what he's done to me. He says it's over. I am devestated. I feel like I can't even breathe.

SAM · Veteran Joined: 03 Mar 2001 Posts: 1989 Location: Chicago

I am so sorry. This has to be so very painful for you.

Do you think it is better to know? Can this help you to see things more clearly and the choices he has made? Can this help you to make decisions to start a new life for yourself?

There is hope. If you seek Him, he will guide you in the direction you need to take. Christ can be your husband, when an earthly husband does not know how.

Missing Him · Newbie Joined: 11 Apr 2006 Posts: 13

Thanks Sam. It is good to know finally, but it hurst like the dickens....no, even more than the dickens.

SAM · Veteran Joined: 03 Mar 2001 Posts: 1989 Location: Chicago

Is there a place you can go to for help to work through all these feelings and abandonment? I pray there is one that you will seek.

I can only imagine and not really know, but I believe it hurts like nothing else has ever hurt before. It's so unfortunate that drugs/addiction will have that pull on someone. But, he has shown you where his love lies -
and it's in his comfort zone of euphoria.

I'm sure your desire is to save him. That's where we will have to continue to pray that God gets his attention, keeps him protected in the meantime, and let God do His work on this man.

Missing Him · Newbie Joined: 11 Apr 2006 Posts: 13

Thanks again SAM! I am working with a couselor from my church which helps a great deal.

DH and I discussed some of our finances today. I kept it completely about finances which seemed to surprise him. As we are getting ready to hang up he says to me "Just call me anytime you need me. Call for anything you need. I will be here." This is as he is crying! Why would I call him for anything I need if he says beyond a shadow of a doubt "IT"S OVER!" Hmmm, I'm thinking more fog talk.

I tell you what. Since my WH has said it is over I have stopped checking on his every move. It is so freeing! I have a little peace now.

SAM · Veteran Joined: 03 Mar 2001 Posts: 1989 Location: Chicago

Your welcome.
Allow God to be your minute by minute, or moment by moment strength and he will bring you peace. He will bring you clarity in your thoughts and emotions and he will guide you toward the direction He wants you to take. Take deep breaths and rely on Him instead of going before Him. Wait on His nudges and you will come to know what He wants you to do.

maryl103 · Newbie Joined: 17 Aug 2006 Posts: 19

been there done that.. Do not give up hope trust in God. My husband has now been free of Drugs and alcohol for 4 years.. it can be done, but we do need to get out of God's way and let him do his work.
Now i face other issues with him, its a hard hard road and i am there with you and pray for you.. take care of you, get healthy and strong and know the Lord knows what he is doing.
ml

Missing Him · Newbie Joined: 11 Apr 2006 Posts: 13

Thanks mary! That was very encouraging! I will pray for your marriage too! Very Happy

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