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jesuslovesyou Junior Member

Joined: 24 Apr 2006 Posts: 36
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Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 1:13 pm Post subject: prayer request |
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| Please pray for my husband and me. We are going away next week for our 20th anniversary. I practically had to force him to go. He suffers from chronic pain & takes a lot of medication. We have had a difficult last 10 years - because of the medical & other problems. We haven't been intimate for 2 years (his choice- some medical & some emotional or as he puts in "no feeling of passion for me") Please pray that this time helps renew some of the passion & that we draw closer & that he feels good & that I don't expect too much, so I can't enjoy what I do get. Thank You. |
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babycakes Veteran

Joined: 06 Mar 2006 Posts: 314 Location: In Prayer
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Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 1:23 pm Post subject: |
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I've prayed for you and asked for God to ignite you both and that all mental and physical limits be taken away during your time away.
Maybe consider picking up the new book by Bill and Pam Farrel to share with him called Red Hot Monogomy. It has over 100 great tips for passion and dates that are not expensive. |
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jesuslovesyou Junior Member

Joined: 24 Apr 2006 Posts: 36
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Posted: Thu Jun 29, 2006 7:49 pm Post subject: Back |
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Well, I am back from our trip & I need advise. Our trip was not as bad as I feared- he didn't just sleep the whole time, but ... we had no sex, we had no intimate discussions... I bought a cute new lingerie - nothing. I have tried all the things in the books. I have tried getting books for us to read together. I have tried books for him to read - He won't. He says he just doesn't have any passion for me & doesn't care & that this is just the way our marriage is & he doesn't want to try to do anything about it. Can men really turn off there sex drive?? or am I fooling myself & there is someone else? What do I do to force the issue. I tried the I can't live this way, if you aren't willing to do something, you need to move out. and he said he doesn't want to move out. We have 2 teenagers & I don't want them to think this is how a marriage & family are supposed to be. Yes, we are all born again Christians. No I haven't gone to counseling myself & I haven't talked to my pastor (huge church, but no family counseling)
Any advise. Please help & Pray for me. |
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SAM Veteran

Joined: 03 Mar 2001 Posts: 2132 Location: Chicago
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Posted: Thu Jun 29, 2006 8:08 pm Post subject: |
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| Have you made an appointment together with the family doctor to have a discussion about what could be underlying physical conditions? I would imagine this is a very difficult and embarrassing subject for your husband. There can be a number of reasons and causes for low sex drive, including low testosterone levels and a number of other things. |
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webacus Veteran

Joined: 02 Mar 2001 Posts: 613 Location: Behind you.
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Posted: Fri Jun 30, 2006 7:17 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | chronic pain & takes a lot of medication... | Could this not be behind the loss of romantic interest? |
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jesuslovesyou Junior Member

Joined: 24 Apr 2006 Posts: 36
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Posted: Fri Jun 30, 2006 12:52 pm Post subject: thanks |
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| Thanks for your input. I asked him to ask his doctor about this last time he saw her (he scheduled it when I couldn't go) but I don't think he did because he says that is not the problem - or maybe because his primary physician is a female, his pain management P.A. is a female, he is uncomfortable bringing it up. He is seeing the neurologist next week. I am going to go with him. This doctor is an older male - may be that will make it easier - though not easier for me to bring it up when he doesn't - thanks for the continued prayers. I won't give up on our marriage, but this is really doing a number on my self esteem. |
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ILOVEWOG Newbie

Joined: 05 Jul 2006 Posts: 3
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Posted: Wed Jul 05, 2006 7:50 am Post subject: |
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| I am praying |
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jo Newbie

Joined: 11 Jul 2006 Posts: 10
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Posted: Tue Jul 11, 2006 10:04 pm Post subject: |
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| My prayer s that God will give you and your husband the wisdom that you need in order to cross-over from this hill you are facing right now. I salute you for having the strenght of mind, character and spirit to just keep working on your marriage, no matter what the odds. God bless you tremendously. |
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SAM Veteran

Joined: 03 Mar 2001 Posts: 2132 Location: Chicago
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Posted: Wed Jul 12, 2006 5:11 am Post subject: |
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| Did you have the doctor appointment? How did it go? |
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jesuslovesyou Junior Member

Joined: 24 Apr 2006 Posts: 36
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Posted: Mon Jul 17, 2006 10:13 am Post subject: |
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| We saw the neurologist, who referred my husband for an MRI of his lower back. He had the MRI on July 11th - we have to wait for it to be read, etc. We didn't get into the no sex issue. My husband was in so much pain that he slept Wed, Thursday and most of friday. Fortunately, he is so valuable at work, they put up with this. Me - I'm having a harder time. He did go to church on Sunday with me though. Please keep praying. Thank you |
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jesuslovesyou Junior Member

Joined: 24 Apr 2006 Posts: 36
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Posted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 3:29 pm Post subject: |
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| My husband's MRI was fine (mixed blessings) - great that there is nothing wrong that they can see - disappointing because then they don't know exactly how to treat the pain down his leg. He is going to have a steroid injection in his left hip/back on 8/23 (please pray). He tried this for his upper back - no pain relief. They suggest this before they they start more serious narcotics. The P.A. says that they pain may be causing his lack of sexual desire - ok so how do I cope with no sex life?? Also, she said that people do just sleep for days when they are in pain. Has anyone out there had success with spinal decompression? That has been suggested by a chiropractor, but it is expensive- worth it if it works, but... We are sceptical. Pray for me to keep going on... and not getting too depressed. Thank you. |
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jesuslovesyou Junior Member

Joined: 24 Apr 2006 Posts: 36
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 8:50 am Post subject: need more prayer |
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| I need more prayer. My husband has been getting gradually worse. Before, I could count on him going to work, but now he is taking more time off due to his pain. Fortunately, since he has worked there for 29 years & has a strong union contract, he has sick days, vacation days, accumulated over-time etc., that we aren't being hurt too much financially, but emotionally, it is tough on him, me, and our teenagers. I started a part time job, during school hours because I am feeling ... so many things & frankly I just needed to do something fun. We just could use an extra dose of prayer becase we are all feeling close to the end of what we can bear. Thank you. |
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