Are You Engaged? - How are you preparing? What's the plan?

Jim · Posted: Sat May 11, 2002 12:57 pm Post subject:

I'm curious ... If you are engaged to be married, are you preparing in any way? If so, how?

Notice I didn't say preparing for the wedding... I'm talking about preparing for a long term marriage relationship.

Do you see value in pre-marriage programs?
What about mentoring?
Are you involved in a church program?
How will you ensure that your marriage will withstand the rough roads ahead? [the odds are against you!]

danielle · Full Member Joined: 19 Apr 2002 Posts: 232

Not officially engaged yet, but preparing.

Planning to take premarital counseling beginning this month.

I feel these are very benefical---the more preparation, the better, given the high divorce rate these days. I don't think couples take their time, get married for the right reasons, or even know the purpose of marriage--which is very spiritual!
Mentoring is important too.

I will handle the rough roads by keeping God in the center of the marriage at all times! Wink

webacus · Posted: Mon May 13, 2002 11:16 am Post subject:

Danielle

What will be involved in your pre-marriage mentoring?
Do you know what the "program" is?
How long? What will be covered?

Also, I'm curious what kind of church you attend and what their "pre-requisites" are for marriage.

Thanks!

danielle · Full Member Joined: 19 Apr 2002 Posts: 232

I just know it generally lasts 4-6 sessions and its 3 weeks apart w/ homework, and that the couple completes some type of profile quiz. I attend a baptist church.

I guess I'll find out all the details when I go for the first session next week.

webacus · Posted: Mon May 13, 2002 11:47 am Post subject:

Cool. You'll need to report back next week! Very Happy

I wonder why there is so much time between sessions.
Who does the mentoring?

danielle · Full Member Joined: 19 Apr 2002 Posts: 232

I want to find that out too---I think its to allow ample time for the homework part. Again, its generally 3 wks apart but I think it can also depend on the couple. (My bf has hated homework since grade school, so he'll need the 3 weeks!)The pastor gives the counseling.

I'll definitely keep you guys posted.

webacus · Posted: Wed May 29, 2002 12:43 pm Post subject:

Danielle

How'd your first mentoring session go?

danielle · Full Member Joined: 19 Apr 2002 Posts: 232

Hi Webacus:
I'm just now seeing your message.

The first session went ok. We just mainly discussed what both of our hesitations/reservations are with each other in pursuing a marriage relationship, and then the pastor made us elaborate and we had a in-depth discussion. We go again next week.

He mentioned we'll take that profile quiz AFTER we decide what we want to do.

I'll continue to keep you posted and do keep us in your prayers that God will lead & guide us 100% throughout this major decision :inlove:

kelly · Posted: Tue Jun 04, 2002 11:45 am Post subject:

Just has some info. I wanted to share.

First, there is a good book called "Preparing for Marraige" that gets you into discussing real, personal, and Godly issues regarding your potential marraige. It would be good to stir up some issues not necessarily talked about otherwise.

Also, if you know of any marraige seminars coming to your area soon, I would encourage you to attend. Family Life has an excellent seminar for the married, and soon to be married alike and it is excellent! Jason and I attended last year amd plan to try to attend every, or every other, year. :inlove:

SAM · Veteran Joined: 03 Mar 2001 Posts: 1946 Location: Chicago

Great suggestion Kelly. Marriage refresher courses at least once a year are the best. It is also a time to get away without the children and have time to just focus on the two of you.

Walking down the aisle without any premarital program and preparation time would not be wise. Unfortunately, the divorce rate is not that different for Christian marriages.

danielle · Full Member Joined: 19 Apr 2002 Posts: 232

Hi Kelly,

I actually have that book right here on my desk if it is by the Raineys. I also have Norman Wright's books too, which are very good. Yes, I've heard about those seminars but unfortunately the one for the engaged couples isn't coming to my area soon. The married one is in June however.

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