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Five Vital Marriage Habits
By Laurie Puhn
To instantly upgrade your communication routine, make these five crucial habits a nonnegotiable part of your daily repertoire. The goal here is to use the five vitals consistently—and yes, that means every single day, unless your schedule prevents it—to let your mate know that your relationship is your number one priority. Once you get the hang of these five habits, you may want to add other good-manners habits that work for you as a couple.
1. Greetings: "Hello" and "Good-Bye"
Do you habitually say hello or good-bye to your mate as one of you enters or exits the home? It is the least you can do to acknowledge that your mate's presence means something to you. A simple hello says, "I'm happy to see you. I'm here for you." A sincere good-bye says, "I know you're going out into the world now, and I care that you are leaving. I'll miss you." When you tell your mom that you'll call her back because your husband just got home or you put the newspaper down to say hello, you are being kind, responsive, and well-mannered. You are making your mate your top priority.
Whether it's you or your mate who is coming or going, I challenge you to be the first one to offer a greeting today. Don't say, "Why should I say it? He could just as easily say it first." Keep in mind that if you have a race to the bottom, you will end up at the bottom. By taking a little initiative, you will end up at the top.
2. "Good Morning"
When I say good morning to my husband, what I really mean is "It is a good morning because I am alive and you are here with me. It is a good morning because we're healthy, or if one of us is sick, then it's a good morning because we can help and support each other." There are spiritual meanings that come through the two simple words "good morning." Each of us can uncover our own meanings for those words. What does "good morning" mean to you? And what do you have to lose by sharing it with your mate?
Reprinted from
Fight Less, Love Moreby Laurie Puhn. Copyright © 2010 by Laurie Puhn. By permission of Rodale, Inc. Available wherever books are sold.
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